The tournament so far: Introduction | Local Qualifier | Regional Qualifier | Round 1
Wendy’s Premium Fish Fillet
The first thing I noticed about this sandwich was how expensive it was. It’s $3.39 for just the sandwich, and cheese is extra. I can’t tell you how much extra, because the signs that are supposed to tell you how much the cheese costs are blank, and the woman at the register didn’t know how much cheese cost either — she just knew it was more. She guessed it was around 40 cents. So if these sandwiches were graded based on communications skills, the Wendy’s Premium Fish Fillet would receive low marks. They are, however, graded on value, and this thing is an expensive sandwich.
The bun is nice and fluffy. It has those little flakes on it like a pseudo-sesame seed bun. I’m sure there is a very simple, mundane description of this but all I can think of is “pseudo-sesame seed.” They’re not seeds — they’re little flakes. The fillet itself is the standard fast-food square. The lettuce comes in single leaf form and the tartar sauce is applied in a nice amount. Toward the very end of the sandwich, I thought I was detecting a light citrusy taste, but I think it was just the last glop of the tartar sauce.
Returning to that near-four-dollar price tag, expense can be forgivable if the quality is high enough. This sandwich shall remain unforgiven for its price. The Premium Fish Fillet is not a bad sandwich. I consider it inoffensive but bland, which I think could end up being a common theme throughout this tournament.
Check the end of this entry for a guest review of the Wendy’s Premium Fish Fillet
Runza fish sandwich
After the regional qualifier, I felt like Runza was my early favorite. But just like any tournament, even good competitors can have an off day.
I had the fish sandwich at a different Runza this past week. Right off the bat, the sandwich was less visually impressive. The bun was smashed and the lettuce leaf was tiny, completely hidden by the fillet itself. The fillet still had the large, impressive “I came from a fish” shape — still unique among the establishments I’ve visited. There appears to be a direct relationship between “How much the fillet looks like it came from a fish” and “How much flavor there is in the fillet,” because I still thought this was a tasty slab o’ cod. Repeating myself from the regional qualifier, I like Runza’s tartar sauce. It’s not as clumpy as traditional tartar sauce, and it reminds me of a tartared version of Runza’s ranch dressing.
My wife, however, was grossed out by this sandwich. She thought hers was soggy and the tartar too sweet. And she’s the Runza fan in the household. I don’t know if I’ve become desensitized to the somewhat universal sogginess of a fast food fish sandwich, or maybe she just got a dud sandwich.
The verdict
I’m going with Runza. This round wasn’t as impressive for them as their qualifying victory, but it was still good enough to beat Wendy’s. Fries did not factor in to this decision — both restaurants had excellent fries when I visited. The deciding factor really came down to cost. Wendy’s Premium Fish Fillet was just too bland to justify such an absurd price. My friend got a medium sized Premium Fish Fillet meal with cheese and spent more than seven dollars. That’s ridiculous. You can get an entire Runza fish combo for almost the same price as just the Wendy’s sandwich! Runza continues to be a favorite, as it combines unique presentation, decent flavor and affordability.
Here is a special guest review of the Wendy’s Premium Fish Fillet. If you would like to submit a guest review, e-mail it to me at nealo@nealo.com. McDonald’s and Hardee’s are coming up this week.
Jerome Walton, former Chicago Cubs centerfielder and 1989 National League Rookie of the Year:
The Wendy’s fish sandwich got crappier as you got to the center, like a Tootsie Pop, but exactly the opposite.
Bun was yummy. I do love a nice piece of bread. Tartar sauce was fine, though I’m a sauce man myself and could’ve used a little more. The lettuce wasn’t wilted like you’d expect at a fast food place. The cheese tasted like cheese, which is always a plus. And the breading — let me give a quick shout-out to the man who first invented the outer shell of nearly every piece of fast-food chicken and fish ever consumed.
You, sir, are an anonymous genius who likely died of a massive heart attack after eating too much of your amazing invention.
That breading is greasy but yet not nauseating. It’s both salty and sweet, likely because the secret recipe includes mountains of sugar and salt. And it’s more addictive than the crack that Shawon Dunston and I used to smoke in the Cubs’ clubhouse back in ’89.
That breading is the official taste of America, as far as I’m concerned. Judging by all the fat, glum people sitting around us at Wendy’s, I am not alone in this belief.
My biggest problem was the fish itself. The sign called it North Pacific cod, but to be quite honest it could’ve been South Atlantic grouper or Platte River trout and I wouldn’t have known the difference. There was very little actual fish to judge, and what there was tasted like cardboard, except blander.
Basically, they could’ve served me some of that breading with cheese and lettuce and tarter sauce and I wouldn’t have known the difference.
In conclusion, I am not a Catholic, and yet I went to Wendy’s and ate a fish sandwich on Friday. Joke’s on me, Jesus.
Go Cubs.